Bllaca and I would like to wish a happy and prosperous new year to all our readers. Here’s to a great 2007.

I saw this in our local grocery store this morning:

New, from a company that likely has nothing to do with Disney whatsoever and probably stole the clip art off the internet— Kity Milk!

Seriously, would you let your child drink something called Kity Milk? I guess it’s better than Dogy Milk, or… actually, let’s stop there.

People are really preparing for the new year here, and the bazaar was a busy place today, full of lovely Turklish goodness. Let’s get right to it.

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When haphaxard raw denim just isn’t eztreme enough.

Oddly, this is a man’s shirt.

…and these are girls’ jeans.

Actually, please don’t.

One size fits all anorexics.

Thank god presidents are limited to two terms, eh?

Here comes the jackpot question in advance: what are you doing New Year Breeze?

They’re hoping this model sells better than Malignant Girl.

This is the brand tag on a sweater— is it my imagination, or is their spokesperson Strawberrybob Trianglebody?

I wish you all a craxy New Year Breeze.

For more Turklish and bazaar craxiness, click here.

It might be Christmas where you are, but here it’s just like spring— the weather is warm, and love is in the air. The scary thing is that, as usual, the signs of love here have manifested as inappropriate messages on children’s clothing. With the exception of the two maternity items, every photo below comes from market stalls dealing exclusively in baby wear and clothes for very young children.

Come on, cringe with me.

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Overdo Girls: pretty good as double entendres go, but these are jeans for a four-year-old. Yikes.

From the pajama table, the Long-Time Lovers… note the female looks satisfied and the male exhausted. If there’s any image less appropriate for babies’ sleepwear than the suggestion of giraffes having marathon sex, I have yet to see it.

Okay, now I’ve seen it.

Athletic 69— they have web sites about that kind of thing.

Yeah, they have web sites about this kind of thing, too.

Biker Gang maternity wear. Yep.

This was also at the maternity stall… as if a pregnant woman needs this sort of press.

Back to the baby clothes, and here’s where it gets really shady: “What are you doing, giraffe— me?”

I don’t even have the words for this one. I was laughing so hard at the dog’s lipstick and, er, position, that I didn’t even notice until much later that she’s wearing a Star of David. If that doesn’t warrant an omfg, I don’t know what does.

So, um, Happy Hanukkah.

At a restaurant in Kaş:

I had the chocolate banana crap, and it was as described.

I’m just now seeing that I could have had enormous piles of cheese crap for free! Damn it.

For more Turklish goodness click here, or to educate yourself in the comic side of Turkish life have a look at these.

With only a couple of weeks left until the new year, it’s time to start thinking about plans and targets for 2007. The word “resolutions” doesn’t work for me, and my guess is it doesn’t for you, either— think back over your new year’s resolutions from years past and be honest about your failure-to-success ratio of projects you started on the first day of the year. Yeah, that’s what I thought. Me too.

But ever since I was a kid I’ve always been a list-maker and goal-setter, and many times people ask me how I manage to get such a high percentage of my to-dos done. The key for me was changing the way I set my goals. Writing out a magic list of ways in which you’re suddenly going to start being the perfect you on the first of January is ridiculous. As a life coach friend of mine once said regarding the passion to succeed, “if you don’t want something badly enough that you’re desperate to start down the road to it today, right this second, then you probably don’t want it badly enough to ever complete it, period. You’re sure as hell not going to magically shoot out of a cannon on January first and straight over the finish line, if the state of your life isn’t disturbing enough to you right now to start doing something about it immediately. You’ll get an initial burst of energy from the cannon, sure, but it won’t carry you far enough, and eventually you’ll land with a thud. Better to have a system in place by which you can make small, consistent steps at any time of year and gradually chip away at those goals.”

So about ten years ago I switched from the Big December Resolution-Setting Extravaganza to a more reasonable system of writing goals down exactly when they formed in my head (be that in December or May or whenever), and measuring my commitment to them by my ability to tiptoe towards those targets in small, measured increments. At first I used to go through my list once a month and tidy it up— remove goals that were no longer relevant, cross completed goals off the list, and reorganise the remaining items by priority. But I still missed the hope and excitement of sitting down in December. There’s just something about the turn of the year that makes one want to have a fresh start. So I did what I always do and took all the parts I liked from each system and combined them into a custom plan that works for me. Nowadays I do light list management on a month to month basis, just reorganising obvious things and adding items as necessary, and I save my big list overhaul for December. I enjoy doing things that way, and for the past decade or so it seems to have worked for me. I certainly get a lot of comments about how much I get done.

You, of course, might not find my system works for you, and the good news about that is that now it’s easy to create your own custom way of working on your goals, thanks to the internet. Back in the day, it used to be that your options for practical goal list management were few and simple: pen and paper was the most likely choice. And the good thing about that system was that you could tape your goal list to the wall for easy, constant reference. Of course, you can still do that, there’s nothing wrong with it, but these days there’s no need to bother yourself with it if you’d rather hang out on the web (and let’s face it, you would— after all, you’re spending your free time reading this right now).

There are a few online options open to the serious goal setter, but far and away the best service I’ve found is the Robot Co-op’s flagship site, 43 Things (this is not to be confused with Merlin Mann’s 43 Folders, which, although a fantastic personal development site in its own right, deserves separate consideration and is not associated with 43 Things except in that the names are similar, which I’m told is just coincidence). I’ve had a 43 Things account for quite some time, they’ve been around a long while, but I just never got around to really digging through the site and discovering everything that it has to offer. But since it’s that time of year, yesterday I decided to have a look and see if I could improve on my current goal list management system (which for the past few years has been a spreadsheet I keep privately on my local drive).

I’ll admit it, I got sucked in hard. I must have spent twelve hours there yesterday excitedly getting myself settled in and organised and motivated. The great thing about 43 Things (aside from the fact that it’s my favourite price: free) is that what initially appears to be the entire site, the part where you set life goals and define ambitions, is only the very tiniest tip of an iceberg that extends up and down and all around your core list of targets, supporting you from every direction. In addition to the community aspects of the actual 43 Things site (e.g. the ability to cheer other people on, give advice on goals you’ve already achieved, or seek help if you’re having trouble moving forward on a goal), there are also four additional web sites, all related to 43 Things, which don’t require separate registration and which you can use freely to supplement your 43 Things experience. Here’s an overview:

• 43 Things: Set goals, show off achievements, get help with your obstacles, help others over theirs, cheer each other on, and get ideas for new things to try.
• 43 Places: Same basic idea as 43 Things, but all about places you want to visit and places you’ve already been— anything from countries and cities to attractions and restaurants.
• 43 People: Half social networking and half role model setting… this is the part of the system I’m still getting to grips with.
• Lists of Bests Here you can make lists of anything you want, and work through your own lists or the lists of others. For instance, one of my goals on 43 Things is to “read 50 books in 2007,” and so I’m going to make a list of 50 books on Lists of Bests and keep track of my progress there.
• All Consuming: A great companion to Lists of Bests, All Consuming details the list items you’ve consumed, and makes it easy for you to share your experiences with others and get suggestions for new items to consume. Consumption categories include anything and everything from books to CDs to films to food and any other custom category you care to invent.

You see now how I spent so much time on this yesterday. It’s a labyrinth. But once you get the hang of how everything seamlessly works together, it becomes fun and I think in the long run it’s going to help me become a lot more productive even than I already am. The one thing that was really missing from my previous spreadsheet system was the aspect of accountability and support— if I failed or gave up, no one knew, and no one was there to console or encourage. With 43 Things, it’s possible that items in danger of sliding downhill can be salvaged, because there’s the help (and let’s face it, pressure) of all those who have already accomplished the same goal and are willing to show you how they got past the obstacles.

So give this to yourself as a holiday gift— sign up here, and get excited not only about 2007, but about the rest of your life.

This third installment of the weekly bazaar is quite heavy on children’s clothing— there was a lot of it on display this week. So, without further ado, on with the Turklish!

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Getting the word out about your drug dealing business can be tricky when you’re not yet old enough to talk.

I’m not sure which is more disturbing: the fact that this is a baby’s shirt, or that there was a domestic animal’s tongue involved somehow.

Go on, say it out loud. You know you want to.

I’m proud of my double major, so what? Shut up, putting it on my clothes isn’t lame.

Oh. Uh…. yeah.

A shirt from the Kinki Kids Collection. With lace, and a satin bow. Mmm-hmm.

The Exploring Expedition crew don’t seem to be too worried about the snappish shelton. Well, this trip was trs expensive, so I guess rather than go home they figure they’ll just run the sign over with the jeep and continue on.

All aboard the 3:10 Gayland Express.

Overheard at the D-Squared South Carolina shirt printing factory: “Hey Travis, does trading have one E or two?”

Note to South Carolinians: hate mail can be directed heere.

Two Star— for when you can’t quite afford something trs expensive.

Looks likes these dogs won the Piston Cup.

Time to head to the person pub.

Turkey, as Muslim countries go, is interesting in that it’s one of the few with a secular government, and thus an inherent openness to all religious beliefs and practices. This means it’s not unusual at this time of year to see Christmas trees, decorations, and banners welcoming the holiday season.

However…

In a typical Turkish culture mix-up of nearly Japanese-like magnitude, the Turks have combined Christmas and New Year into a single holiday on a single date. As far as they’re concerned, it’s all the same thing. Ask a Turk what date Christmas Eve is, and almost invariably he’ll look at you like you’re an idiot and say, “December 31st, of course.” If you correct him and tell him it’s a week before that, he’ll just laugh and dismiss you like you’re yanking his chain.

Scenes like the one on the left (the Christmas tree installation bearing the banner proclaiming “Happy New Year”) prevail everywhere, and as the end of the 31st approaches the Turks grab someone to kiss in preparation for the “countdown to Christmas.”

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve tried to convince various Turkish people that Christmas is on the 25th. Most think I’m kidding or trying to fool them; others furrow their brows and comment that this 25th thing must be some weird made-up holiday that only I (me personally, Melissa Maples) celebrate. After all, everyone knows Christmas is on the 31st. That’s a simple fact. Duh. Even showing them evidence via Google of the real date of Christmas only provokes responses of, “oh, that’s just some internet hoax. You can find any old fake crap on the internet. We’re not that stupid.” Sigh.

Turkey is business-as-usual on the 25th, and it’s very odd indeed the first time you experience this. You wake up on Christmas morning and nothing feels different, nothing feels special. In the morning you see people heading to work as if it were any other day (and to them that’s exactly what it is). I have to admit, for the first couple of years I enjoyed this immensely. I’ve never been a fan of Christmas, and it was nice to have a break from the madness of it. This year, however, I’ll admit I’ve been trying to inject a bit of holiday spirit into the atmosphere. I haven’t gone as far as buying a Christmas tree (which you can get here fairly inexpensively), but I have a playlist of holiday songs, and I’ve tricked out my computer desktop beyond all belief. That’s enough for me, really.

With the exception of my boyfriend (who caught on fairly quickly, I have to say), I’ve given up trying to convert Turks to the idea of Christmas actually being on Christmas. When people greet me on the 31st with a kiss on either cheek and a wish of “Merry Christmas,” I just smile and nod and wish them Happy New Year in return, to which they smile and nod as if we’ve both just wished each other exactly the same thing. I know when I can’t win, and this battle is a hopeless cause, I’m afraid. Pass the egg nog.

So if your strange made-up internet hoax fake Christmas on the 25th doesn’t go as well as you hoped, feel free to pop over here and join us for the remix on the 31st. It’s guaranteed to be a drunken affair— secular government and all that. You gotta love Turkey.

And speaking of Christmas remixes, make sure you get your copy of the NCM Illegal Christmas Compilation. I found this mirror after NCM were forced to take the original down last year. So you’re welcome. And Merry Christmas (whichever one you choose to celebrate).

I just discovered a great holiday extra for those of you who are running Mac OSX.4 Tiger— Interdimension Media make a Widget called Festive Lights. In its default state Festive Lights is a string of decorative lights for your Dashboard, but if you combine it with the DevMode Widget by Jeremy Williams, you can drag your Festive Lights from the Dashboard out onto the desktop for neverending holiday spirit! For those who are technically impaired, here’s a quick twinkly desktop bling walkthrough:

1. Make sure you are running OSX.4 or higher
2. Download and install the Festive Lights Widget (after downloading, the installer should run automatically)
3. Trick out your new Widget with as many custom lightsets as you like (download them from the same page as the Festive Lights Widget— follow the installation instructions) and get your twinkle-to-colour ratio set up exactly how you want it
4. Download and install the DevMode Widget
5. Click the red button on the Widget to turn DevMode to “On” (button should turn green)
6. Click and hold the mouse button down anywhere on your string of Festive Lights
7. Without letting go of the mouse button, press the F12 key (or whatever your Dashboard hotkey is) and exit Dashboard
8. Voilà! You’ve magically dragged your Widget out onto the desktop.
9. Admit that this is awesome, go back to the Interdimensional Media site and make a donation (this part is optional, of course, but supporting great little apps like this encourages future development and boosts your holiday karma)
10. Contact Jeremy Williams and wish him a happy holiday season for making it possible to drag your Festive Lights onto your desktop so easily.

Banishing the Festive Lights to the place from whence they came is simple enough, too: just hold down the option key, and you’ll see the little X appear near the top left corner of your lights. Click on the X, lights disappear.

Time to get in the holiday spirit, everyone. Enjoy your lights!

I’ve been checking out a blog called Indexed for about a week now, and it has become one of the morning reads I most look forward to. Half laughing-at-facts humour and half math class, Indexed looks at home truths through the medium of graphs and charts drawn on 3X5 index cards. It’s updated at least once a day, and it’s refreshingly sharp and funny. Link